4/22/2011 WWE SmackDown Report

4/22/2011 WWE SmackDown Report
By The Reporter ? WrestleSite.com

Green Day and pyro kick us off as Josh Matthews welcomes us. We are in London, England! Later tonight, Alberto Del Rio will host a Retirement Party for Edge. Also, The Corre will defend the WWE Tag Team Championship against Big Show and Kane and Wade Barrett will put his Intercontinental Championship on the line against Kofi Kingston.

The vacant World Heavyweight Championship hangs above the ring.

Tony Chimel introduces the recently knight Sir Michael Cole. He comes out in a king?s cape to royal music, waving to the audience. The Cole Mine is adorned with English paraphernalia from a large cutout of Prince William to a number of English flags. His seat is a throne.

Cody Rhodes? music hits (three men in suits walk behind him with a cart) and it promo time. Everyone can see that he?s wearing a mask- a mask that is for protection and protection only. On the other hand, Rey Mysterio wears a mask because he is hiding something. He is hiding his fears; he is hiding his loathing thoughts; he is hiding because he is ashamed of himself. We are all wearing masks as well. Rhodes can see through them- he can see our envy of him. He can see that our lives are miserable. The sick thing is that as bad as things are for us, we all hope it?s worse for our neighbors, friends and family. Tonight, Rhodes will offer a remedy at his expense. He pulls out a brown paper bag with eye, nose and mouth holes cut out. Rhodes instructs the three ?assistants? who accompanied him to hand out the masks. They do, and most fans at ringside put them on. These masks will cover their lying eyes. They will cover those blackheads protruding from their skin. Rhodes wants them to cover their faces until he is drafted from this show. At the very least, he wants them to cover their faces until he defeats Mysterio tonight. Rey, this one?s for you.

Match One: Cody Rhodes (5-4) vs. Rey Mysterio (10-5)
Rhodes gets right on offense with a boot to the gut and right hands. Mysterio slows him down with a kick to the chest. He tosses him over the top and drops him with a seated senton off the apron as we go to commercial.

Back from break, Rhodes knocks Mysterio off the top rope and comes down on him with stomps. He presses his knee against Mysterio?s face as the crowd chants ?619.? Rhodes stomps a few more times before running into a boot to the face in the corner. Mysterio sits on a powerbomb attempt for two. He hits with a couple rights before Rhodes counters a rana into a backbreaker. Cover gets two and Rhodes stretches Mysterio?s back against the ringpost. He grabs Mysterio?s leg but Mysterio hits with an enzuigiri that puts Rhodes in position for a 619. Rhodes avoids it by sending Mysterio to the apron. Mysterio gets in a shoulder shot and a knee to the face through the ropes. On the apron, Mysterio grabs a leg but ends up being pushed into the ringpost as we go to commercial.

Back from break, Rhodes has a facelock applied on Mysterio. Mysterio fights out, slides underneath Rhodes but takes a powerslam for two. Rhodes stomps and drops a knee on the face. He forcefully throws Mysterio into the turnbuckle and rams his mask into Mysterio?s head. Cover gets two. Rhodes slugs away in the corner and perches Mysterio on the top rope. Mysterio fights him off and comes down with a seated senton. He hits a springboard crossbody for two. Rhodes tries for a sunset flip but Mysterio rolls through. Rhodes ducks the kick to the head and covers for two. Mysterio regroups and connects with a second attempt at the kick to the head. Cover gets two. Mysterio climbs to the top but Rhodes meets him with a dropkick on the way down for two. Rhodes kicks at the chest and calls for Cross Rhodes. He takes too long and Mysterio rolls him up for the win.
Winner: Rey Mysterio in 15:00
Rating: **1/2 (Fine TV match that was hampered by two commercial breaks. I preferred their Mania match, but they weren?t trying to outshine that performance. This was only here to even up the Mysterio/Rhodes series at 1-1. Good start to the show.)

Post-match, Cody Rhodes attacks Rey Mysterio. He throws Mysterio into the barricade a couple times before tossing him into the crowd. Mysterio fights back, clotheslining Rhodes back to the ringside area. They make their way back into the crowd and Mysterio sends Rhodes flying over the barricade. Mysterio climbs the barricade but Rhodes regains the advantage by taking his legs out. Rhodes uses his mask as a weapon before hitting Cross Rhodes. He grabs a paper bag and places it over Mysterio?s head. Crowd chants ?pa-per bag, pa-per bag.?

Later tonight, both the WWE Tag Team and Intercontinental Championships are on the line. Also, Alberto Del Rio hosts Edge?s Retirement Party; you can go on Facebook for an RSVP.

In the back, Justin Gabriel is with Wade Barrett. Gabriel says his eliminating of Barrett last week was nothing personal. Barrett thinks it might have been personal- to be frank, he would not have done the same to Gabriel. Heath Slater steps in. Both Gabriel and Barrett would sell their grandmothers down the river to get ahead. What they need to talk about is unity. The Corre- there is no leader; they are all equals. Ezekiel Jackson joins them. As their leader, he is there for them. Barrett stares him down before Zeke claims he was just messing around. They tease a confrontation before breaking into laughter. They are a unit.

We get highlights of last week?s couple?s therapy with LayCool. Earlier this week, they were back at it. Michelle McCool tells the therapist this is working out wonderfully- last week, Layla lost another match! At least Layla competed. McCool takes credit for Layla being the Diva she is- all she?s done is ride her coattails. Speaking of which, McCool wants her coat back. The therapist tries to get a word in, but is cut off by a simultaneous ?shut up, baldie? from LayCool. McCool claims she was the real Diva?s Champion. Layla wants some respect; otherwise, she doesn?t know if LayCool can stay together. McCool isn?t sure Layla is Flawless. Layla starts to cry and McCool apologizes. They hug, but as Layla thanks the therapist, McCool grabs and throws her into the couch.

Can he have our attention please? Michael Cole is in the ring and pitches it to a video of Jim Ross kissing his feet on Raw. Cole is cracking up. First, he shot JR with BBQ sauce, then he made him kiss his feet. We then get a video of his knighting. Indeed, he is Sir Michael Cole; however, there can only be one All-American American- Jack Swagger.

Match Two: Jack Swagger (5-3) vs. Trent Barreta (1-4)
Swagger gets a quick go-behind before knocking Barreta down with a clothesline. He throws Barreta into the corner and stomps. The Running, Leaping Swagger Bomb connects and Swagger slaps Barreta around. Barreta hits with an enzuigiri and a back elbow. He comes off the ropes with a springboard but Swagger catches him with a powerbomb. He puts in the Anklelock and it?s over.
Winner: Jack Swagger in 1:00
Rating: N/A (Yet another squash win for Swagger in a long line of them recently. It could be argued that he is in a better position right now than he was this time last year as World Heavyweight champion.)

We get shots of Big Show on the Kid?s Choice Awards. The WWE Tag Team Championship match is next.

Somebody with beastly fingers wishbones the legs of a doll. That?s what Barbie gets for cheating on Ken. Karma is a you-know-what.

Match Three: WWE Tag Team Championship- Justin Gabriel? (5-5)/Heath Slater? (3-7) vs. Big Show (8-4)/Kane (7-7)
Kane starts with Slater. Slater ducks an attack and throws fists. Kane overpowers him and gives him a back body drop. He hits a low dropkick for two. Show tags in and delivers a big chop. He continues by pressing his ass against Slater?s face before tagging in Kane who knocks Slater down with an uppercut. Zeke looks on from ringside. Inside, Slater chopblocks Kane knee and tag in Gabriel who falls to a big right hand. Kane hits a couple splashes in the corner and a sidewalk slam for two. He climbs to the top but Zeke knocks him down behind the ref?s back. Slater tags in and mounts with punches. He locks in a chinlock and has Gabriel tag himself in. Gabriel stomps and covers for one. He puts in a front facelock as the crowd rallies behind Kane. Kane fights out but falls to a tilt-a-whirl DDT for two. Slater tags in and climbs to the top. He comes off but eats another uppercut. Show tags in and knocks Slater down with shoulderblocks. He calls for a chokeslam and catches Gabriel coming off the top. He tosses Gabriel out of the ring and onto Zeke. Zeke climbs to the apron but Kane pushes him off. Back inside, Show finishes off Slater with a chokeslam.
Winner: Big Show/Kane in 4:00 to win the WWE Tag Team Championship
Rating: *3/4 (Match was short, but entertaining. Interesting parallels between the 2011 and 2005 tag team championship scene. In 2005, the titles went from Hurricane/Rosey (comedy team) to Lance Cade/Trevor Murdoch (heel group) to Show/Kane. In 2011, the titles went from Marella/Kozlov (comedy team) to The Corre (heel group) to Show/Kane.)

Later tonight, Kofi Kingston gets his rematch for the Intercontinental Championship.

In the back, Justin Gabriel and Heath Slater are pissed off at Ezekiel Jackson. Before they blame Zeke, they need to look in the mirror. Zeke walks away and Slater knocks Gabriel down.

Match Four: Drew McIntyre (4-10) vs. Chris Masters (0-4)
Masters actually gets an entrance.and his posedown now includes two Val Venis finger points. Lockup to start and Masters powers McIntyre into the corner. They tease a test of strength but McIntyre goes low with a kick. He hits with rights but Masters tosses McIntyre onto the apron. Masters tries to apply the Masterlock but McIntyre doesn?t let him. McIntyre rams Masters? head into the turnbuckle but Masters regroups and knocks him down with a chop. McIntyre comes back by snapping his neck across the top rope. Back inside, McIntyre hits a neckbreaker for two and stomps on the back of his head. He delivers a clothesline in the corner followed by another in the middle of the ring. McIntyre poses to cheers and covers for two. He calls for a Future Shock DDT but Masters rolls him up for two. Masters hits a nice high angle sitout spinebuster for two more. He gives McIntyre a couple of chops and knocks him down with a clothesline. He stays on offense with a back elbow and climbs to the middle rope. He comes off with a shoulderblock and tries for the Masterlock again. McIntyre pushes off the corner to escape. He hits the Future Shock DDT for the win.
Winner: Drew McIntyre in 4:00
Rating: *3/4 (At 4 minutes, this was Masters? longest Smackdown match in quite some time. Fun while it lasted, and good to see McIntyre get a win; only thing is, Smackdown is already heel-heavy. I wouldn?t be surprised to see him drafted to Raw.)

The Raw Rebound revisits the John Morrison/R-Truth segment from Raw.

Josh Matthews and Booker T discuss R-Truth?s actions before recapping the Cody Rhodes/Rey Mysterio segment from earlier tonight. At Extreme Rules, it will be Mysterio vs. Rhodes in a Falls Count Anywhere match.

Match Five: Intercontinental Championship- Wade Barrett? (3-10) vs. Kofi Kingston (7-10)
Barrett comes out with Ezekiel Jackson. Kingston starts out hot with strikes in the corner. He hits an uppercut but runs into a back elbow. Barrett connects with a northern lariat and stomps away. He heads outside and clubs Kingston?s chest before being tossed into the barricade. Kingston leaps onto the top rope and throws himself onto Barrett on the outside as we go to commercial.

Back from break, Barrett is stretching Kingston?s shoulders. During the break, Barrett threw Kingston into the ring steps. Barrett charges at Kingston in the ropes but ends up outside once again. Kingston follows and Zeke tries to club him but Kingston moves out of the way. Zeke hits Barrett accidently. Kingston throws Barrett back in but Barrett catches him with a hard kick. Barrett tells Zeke to go away. Zeke retreats to the back. Kingston takes advantage of the distraction with a roll up for two. He covers again for two more before hitting the Kingston Series. He finishes it off with the Boom Drop and calls for Trouble in Paradise. Barrett ducks it and tries for Wasteland but Kingston makes him stumble into the corner. With Kingston on the middle rope, Barrett connects with a big boot. Kingston tries for a rollup but Barrett sits on it and covers- one hand on the ropes for leverage- for the win.
Winner: Wade Barrett in 7:00 to retain the Intercontinental Championship
Rating: ** (Hard to rate as almost half of it took place during the commercial. No telling what they do with Kingston going forward. The way this match ended, I could see Kingston getting another rematch, but I really hope they put someone new in the IC title picture.)

Up next, Edge?s Retirement Party, hosted by Alberto Del Rio.

WWE Draft this Monday.

Edge?s Retirement Party
The World Heavyweight Championship is still hanging above the ring. The ring is decorated with a black mat, golden balloons, some items covered by a black cloth and Brodus Clay. His name is Alberto Del Rio, but we already know that. We also know that no one throws a party like Del Rio. That said, he brought presents for Edge. He takes the black cover off the first one to reveal a grandfather clock. With it, Edge can watch his life tick away. Tick, tock, tick, tock. Del Rio knows people with injuries such as Edge?s lose control of their lower body. Most of the time, they cannot make it to the bathroom. For that reason, his second gift is adult diapers. Del Rio also knows that in retirement, there is nothing better than friends.

Lita?s music hits and a large woman with red hair comes out. I?d like to point out that some fans at ringside are still wearing Cody Rhodes? paper bags. Clay helps ?Lita? into the ring. Lita looks heavier, but Del Rio thinks she?s never looked better. Now, she and Edge can have quality time together. If they want to go for a stroll, they will be able to because Edge will have this.Del Rio reveals the third covered item to be a walker. I hear some faint acoustic guitar music playing in the background, not sure where it?s coming from. This brings Del Rio to his last gift- Edge?s new ride! Ricardo Rodriguez comes out on a power scooter (w/oxygen tank) to Kerwin White?s old theme music! Haha, and he does the Edge pyro! Fantastic. Now Edge can go anywhere he wants. Here?s the best part: he will have his own handicap parking pass. All of this is courtesy of the Essence of Excellence; the soon-to-be World Heavyweight Champion, Alberto Del Rio.

You think you know me. Huge pop. Edge is here. Didn?t Del Rio get his RSVP? He went on Facebook and told him he?d be here- whether it?s Mexico, the United States or right here in London, England. We already know that 1) Del Rio sucks, and 2) Del Rio is a lousy party host. Some might even call him a party pooper. The fake Lita has about 1500lbs of poop down there- she looks like one big flaming bag of poop. Del Rio sends Clay to get Edge, and he makes his way to the entrance stage. Christian sneaks up from behind with a ladder and attacks Clay. Del Rio tries to intervene but Christian takes him out as well. Christian sets the ladder up in the middle of the ring and retrieves the World Heavyweight Championship to close the show. Crowd loves it.

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